“We start with the story because it is basic to human nature. It’s like a biological fact, an inborn insistence.” Roger Rosenblatt Unless it Moves the Human Heart: The Craft and Art of Writing.
My story today: directionless chaos.
Swirling words…ideas…concepts and all I need is guided centering.
The first book is done. An epic battle. A collection of moments won while all that other life happened around me…the kids, and my coaching, and our moves and absentee husband… and now what?
Now I’ve carved out more opportunities to write in a day, and what do I do? Anything but write.
It has been easy the last few months. I knew I needed to finish the marriage book…I knew when I had the time, that was what I would do, and now that it’s done…What now? Well…I think I flail for a bit.
This is not an unusual pattern for me. One other blip of inexplicable performance-stall happened just after I got my acceptance letter to college. I had worked so hard in high school (too hard in retrospect) and I hadn’t really thought what the world would look like from the perspective of an enrolled freshman. All I had ever considered was getting in.
Well, here I am again. I’m in. I am among the published, and people are going to come to listen to me as if I have something worthwhile to say. I know I do… or at least I think I do…no, I know I do. I’m just having a hard time believing I’m on the other side of that distant goal.
I can’t help but to want to write my story…the inane, the frustrating, the raw and the hilarious. I can’t help it. I just want to do a really good job.